Grief That Takes Your Name

Jeremy Duncan

Oct 25

Written by Kevin Borst

Sunday, October 25, 2026

Scriptures: Ruth 1:1-5

In this opening message of our Ruth: The Chosen Family series, Jeremy looks at the prologue of the book, verses 1–5.
Star of the Show: In the first section of the sermon, Jermey argues that while Ruth and her faithfulness catches our attention, Naomi's movement from utter emptiness to fullness forms the narrative core of the book. Ruth is the main character while Naomi is a central character.
Story as Polemic: Jeremy makes a point that this ancient, woman-centred narrative likely functioned as a defence of the marginalized and a critique of post-exilic exclusion policies. When the Israelites came back from the exile, Ezra and Nehemiah (see Nehemiah 13) argued against intermarriage in order to protect Israel’s national identity.
Proper Names: In this section, Jeremy looked at the literary background of the text and how it uses symbolic names—such as Naomi meaning "pleasantness" and Ruth meaning "friend"—to reveal Naomi's tragedy of losing her sons, her standing, and her very identity. It is tale from which we are meant to draw lessons and the names clue the audience to how to hear this story.
Losing Our Self: in the final part of the message, Jeremy looked at how in Hebrew, after her losses, Naomi is not called by her name, simply “the woman.” He made a point that often grief we experience after losing our identity markers can erode the sense of who we are. Jeremy wrapped up the message by turning to Mark 1:9-11, where the baptism of Jesus reminds us that before we do or produce anything, our enduring identity is God's beloved.
Community is shaped by the conversations we share. These questions and reflections are a tool to help you meaningfully engage with the themes of this week's teaching.
Connect: Connect via a mental experiment. If you lost your current job title, your primary role at home, or the thing you are most known for among your peers, how would you introduce yourself to a room full of strangers?
Share: Share about your experience of transitions. Jeremy made a point that the introduction to the book of Ruth poses a question to us, and “the question is not how we bypass grief but we hold on to ourselves in the midst of it.”
Jeremy noted how subtle transitions—aging, changes in health, or a growing child no longer needing help buckling their car seat—can quietly sting and make us wonder who we are now.

Can you share an experience where a significant change or loss or transition in your life caused you to feel like you were losing a part of yourself? What helped you navigate that shift?
Reflect: Reflect on the idea that the Book of Ruth may have been written or popularized as a direct polemic against the strict nationalist reforms in Nehemiah 13, which sought to preserve community purity by banishing foreign spouses and ancestors like the Moabites.
What do you think of or, better, how do you react to the idea that biblical writers within the same time frame might be in active theological debate or tension with one another over who belongs? How does it make you feel that the Bible contains books with seemingly opposing agendas?
And how do the tensions in our current culture around "protecting boundaries" and "welcoming the outsider" make you feel and engage or disengage?
Engage: Engage with these words from the sermon,
"Before Jesus has performed a miracle or called a disciple, before he offered a prayer in public or even a single word of wisdom, Jesus walks down to the Jordan river.
And the first divine words recorded in the gospel of Mark are not from Jesus. They are these words that come down from heaven: 'You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased'. Which means that the first time we meet Jesus, it’s not as teacher or rabbi, it’s not prophet or saviour, it’s not with any title that’s connected to anything that he has done or will do. It is simply—beloved son...
Our inherent worth does not come from what we produce, or from the titles we acquire, or from how we live up to the expectations of those around us. Because all of that can get taken away. And if it does it will hurt... But it still will not change your identity as the beloved child of an infinite God."

What makes it so difficult to anchor our identity in being “beloved" and so much easier to ground it in our productivity, titles, or roles?

What would it look like in your life to practically embody the truth of someone else’s “belovedness” as the foundation of who they are? Basically, how do we journey with those walking through the season of loss?
Take away: What is one thing that you're taking with you into your week, either from the sermon or our conversation?
Prayer from the sermon:
God of grace and love,
As we open the scriptures today, help us to continue to listen
Not just to the voices we already know,
Or the stories that sound like our own,
But also to those we might otherwise overlook.
To people whose experiences challenge our assumptions,
And whose lives invite us to see the world a little differently.
And as we begin this journey through the story of Ruth,
remind us that sometimes the most important stories are found
in unexpected places.
In the lives of ordinary people.
In unexpected friendships.
In the quiet courage of those who choose to care for one another.
And then, teach us to recognize your presence there.
So that these ancient words might do more than inform us.
But slowly shape us into people who listen more carefully,
Who love more generously,
and who work to make room for one another
in ways we can scarcely see just yet.
In the strong name of the risen Christ we pray,
Amen.
CALL TO WORSHIP Psalm 98
MUSIC Curated by Kevin B.
Cody Carnes - Firm Foundation
Mission House - Whole Heart
Common Hymnal - The Kingdom is Yours
Mission House - Good God

PRAYER OF CONFESSION
Written by Yelena Pakhomova
As part of our worship today, I invite you to join me in a prayer of confession.
“Confession is a prayer of return.”
It is a reminder that we can change.
And that Divine mercy is found in the totality of our lives and not only in those parts that we see as good and are happy to reveal to others. Confession is about a return to integrity and wholeness that can help us start anew. Our prayer of confession today will have three parts and an element of response. After each section, you are welcome to join me in saying the Jesus prayer together.
It goes likes this: “Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on us.”
Let us pray.
I.
Our loving God,
whose grace finds us in our darkest times and whispers,
“This is not the end.”
As we check in with our hearts today,
we trust that same abundant grace will meet us
and guide us with gentleness.
Especially as we think about
those moments of anger or harshness
that we’ve allowed to boil over and spill to others,
the moments of mindless distraction we’ve slipped into,
and the ways we have not used our gifts.
For all those times, we ask you to forgive us, and we pray:
Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on us.
II.
God of welcome,
who always makes room to include more people at the table.
We confess that often we’re not great at doing the same.
For withholding our presence from somebody who needed us,
for criticism, impatience, self-righteousness,
for the lack of empathy and ignorance of someone’s pain.
We ask you to forgive and renew us, and we pray:
Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on us.
III.
God of true peace,
We confess our participation in the structures and institutions
that thrive on inequality
and, in pursuit of wealth, abuse your creation.
We confess our slowness to learn,
and our fear and suspicion that often stand
in the way of relationship and reconciliation.
We ask you to set us free from all fear
so that we can follow you with courage, and we pray:
Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on us.
Now receive this affirmation:
May you trust that you can never wander too far from grace.
May God’s love and mercy always guide you home.
Amen.
SERIES BUMPER
The Story of Ruth